Why Make It Up When It’s All Right There?
Friends send me strange news bits knowing I will find a use for them. I believe to distract me from using anything personal they might have told me that would read like great fiction. Here’s the real story about the dead woman and the TV from last week. Straight from The Daily Mail.
“A woman has been killed after falling from the ninth floor of a block of flats in Russia while having sex – but her partner survived after landing on top of her.
The woman, aged 30, was found dead at the base of an apartment block in St. Petersburg on the night of July 5 during what neighbors described as a wild party. Witnesses said they saw a television thrown from the window of the flat, after which the woman and her 29-year-old lover plunged to the ground below. The woman landed head-first on the asphalt and died instantly, local media reported, but the man survived after his fall was broken by her body and nearby bushes. Witnesses told local media that the partially clothed man then got up and went back to rejoin the party.
Police were called, and when they arrived the revelers allegedly threw a mop out of the windows at them. Initial reports suggested the woman had been killed by the falling TV, but images from the scene clearly show her naked from the waist down. After interviewing witnesses, investigators concluded that the couple were having sex on a windowsill when they fell. Two other men were in the flat when the fall happened, but are not thought to have been involved.”
In my Dick Derringer PI version the cops walk away from it because of the TV, no one comes forward about the partially clothed dude for pick-your-reason. In the cop’s interviews the party dudes paint the girl as depressed and despondent over a break up, and the dude who landed on her has bailed. Derringer sets out to uncover the cover up after a scared old lady with an ankle biter dog throws a mop out her window to get his attention. A mop later used in a funny fight scene.
There you have it. Who’s writing it?
St Petersburg, Russia?
Sounds like it could have just as easily bernSt Petersburg, Florida.
So I say Florida Man is the author.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I think maybe a snotty new condo close to revitalized downtown anywhere. Maybe the bouncing beau is a second string ne’er do well running back or other jock, maybe college and the woman is a jilted grad instructor? Or a ladder climbing marketing exec and the windowsill gambit was a way to get rid of her for blowing (no pun intended) an endorsement deal…or a trying to a porn actress and the whole thing was a blown(again) skyline behind the grind shot.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I’m speechless.
LikeLiked by 1 person
The news version sounds like it could be spring break in Fort Lauderdale, FL. I like your version an awful lot though.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ugh. Next. Find us one with a Dremel tool and doughnuts.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Turn on the television. There are probably 40 Murder porn shows. Last night a guy and his girlfriend went shopping at Walmart for a recip saw capable of cutting up his dead wife. Over a custody battle? Meh. Falling out a window mid coitus, using the parter for a trampoline and walking away? The sexist objectification angle alone is
LikeLike