No shit, really. It’s already a fact that Event Brite handles the free “tickets” to Mass. In order to maintain social distancing requirements, only a certain number are allotted.
Well, found out this week that reserved seating (tickets) to Christmas Eve services are available, social distancing math and everything. The catch is, since everybody wants to make a good show of holiness to the relatives, that reserved seating will set you back $500.
So I figured I’d go ask an authority, and who better than Robert Plant, the man who wrote the last word on the subject. I got his answer.
If you hear a rustle in the hedgerow, don’t be alarmed now, It’s just the clinking of the dolly’s wheels…
Huh, wait…
Nothing hidden or deep, meaning-wise. Simply the clinking of the dolly required to haul the cash box back to the rectory. Which is far less obscure than the sprinkling of the May queen. I mean seriously. Why’s she ‘sprinkling’ in the hedgerow?
Heh, heh, heh… if there’s one thing to be learned from the scamdemic, it’s been the excuse of the millennium for every scam artist of every strip to make some killing from it, literally and figuratively.
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*sigh* it’s things like that that make it a lot harder to tell people what I do on the weekend.
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Now you have to spill the beans. I’ve been every sort of Catholic you can think of. EM, lector, usher, sound guy, install guy, spontaneously conscripted overflow collection guy…guy who pops off in front of the Bishop…
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Don’t worry, no tribute bands here. I don’t have any interesting beans to spill. I am mainly in the old lady crowd with studies and adoration duty and CCD. CCD was a truly wonderful, profound experience. It gave me an hour each week to contemplate ending my own life. I admit I one of those people who mysteriously show up wherever a food-related event is being held.
I am sure whoever the bishop was, he probably deserved it.
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The fun thing about working in Catholic Churches “fixing” their sound systems, besides the free lunches, is the off the cuff conversations. Once you figure out it’s not all about you, even if it is, because it is, the self demolition thing becomes a comedy routine. Unless you’re completely useless, then it’s a consideration. The trouble is those who are completely useless don’t know it!🤣
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I think behind the scenes people get the most enjoyment out of things in general.
Btw you’re a good guy, Phil. Most people jump at the opportunity to say what they really think when they hear the “C C” words. Appreciated.
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Don’t tell me you’re in a Zep tribute band…
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Churches lost a lot of money they budgeted this year, so they have to make up for it somehow…
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You got it!!!
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Yep. Just like why the cops have speed traps up on Sunday mornings!
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Yeah, I remember getting a speeding ticket one Sunday morning, only I was leaving church, not going to. Lunch date and I was late. The cop didn’t buy it. Didn’t help that I was riding my 650 Yamaha twin and it was a very frisky beast… Let’s just say I was unacceptably much over the speed limit.
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I heard that!
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