Looney Lunes #159 3-Fer

Thank God for North Carolina

PLEASE DO NOT LICK THE BATHROOM WALLS. THANK YOU.
– BCBB STAFF

How you know West Virginia is nearby.

Thank God For Disney

In the Grimm’s Fairy Tales version of “Cinderella,” in an attempt to fool the prince the evil stepsisters cut off parts of their feet to fit into the glass slipper. It didn’t work.   

Nobody said getting the Princess gig was going to be easy…

One Fish, Two Fish, One Too Many Fish

Dr. Seuss’s wife committed suicide after she discovered he was having an affair with a close family friend. 

Having cancer and other health issues didn’t help…

 

 

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Looney Lunes #158

And The New Slang Term For Politician is –

Jellyfish possess a single orifice that serves as both a mouth and an anus.

Looney Lunes #157 – Like, Uh…

“Something will pop up in my head. It could be like the weirdest thing. Like all’a sudden like I have a jumping banana in my head. And I stop and pause. I’m like that damn jumping banana is in my head. Like, I don’t know what’s going on.”

Swimmer Ryan Locthe – 12 time Olympic medal winner.

So, like when I get like major grief for like a Ford Scholarship ballet dancer who like drives too fast and like hates fishing but for real, with like, you know, some help from Jackson and like everybody at Peaches Garage welded up her own like totally stellar sounding cherry bomb glasspacks, you know, like I say, well, like being waaaaay good at something doesn’t like, you know, um, pre-clude a character from being, like, well, hip and talented and, umm…goofy. Like all rolled into the same character burrito.

Looney Lunes #156 – Open to Interpretation

This could go so many ways…

“Isn’t that sign an oxymoron? Or some form of heresy?”

“I dunno. But we have a pretty good selection of it.”

“?!”

 

Looney Lunes #157

This Just In –

These were making the rounds in email last week. We all know someone that subscribes to the news of the weird and forwards them…At least these are funny so I’ll tip my Point Cabrillo Lighthouse cap to an old high school friend – Brad Jernigan at JDC Drilling in OKC

I saved the two best for last –

All who labor to write fiction – we can’t make this stuff up. There is a very non PC short involving a 70s band on a TV stage, wanking away, nothing plugged in.

“Forget that stuff, man. For this gig tell the crew to leave the cables and the tuners in the truck.”

I mean, did the barbershop singers really sing?

 

 

Looney Lunes #156

This Just In –

Now, Spelling Bee Kids Will Have To Know Definations
Headline, AP Story

Number 7, please. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

Man Punches Himself, Charged With Assault
Headline, Gallup (New Mexico) Independent

Why? Because it feels so good when I stop.

Solid Waste To Be On Table For Discussion
Headline San Marcos (Texas) Daily Record

That’s either a meeting I can miss, or any number that I’ve attended.

Looney Lunes #151

If Medicare Fraud Isn’t Bad Enough –
Meet Obamacare for the Walking Dead

Have you ever been in an accident that resulted in your death.

___ Yes
___ No

No shit really –  this is (was) on the Healthcare.gov website when I checked it out.