First, find a bunch of storks…
“What is needed to make more babies in Portugal?”
-President of Portugal Anibal Antonio Cavaco Silva
Well, not having to come up with four names would be another good place to start. And then there’s the birds and bees stuff if the storks are a fail.
This guy was elected, by the way.
Your Freudian Slip Is Showing
A story that appeared in Sunday’s Argus Observer contained an incorrect spelling of a name. Pastor Dick Bigelow was incorrectly identified as Dick Bigblow. The Argus Observer regrets the error.
correction notice, Argus Observer (Ontario, Canada)
Our HR director talks about the gender split & tits importance at O2. Read more at: O2 Twitter
tweet by telecommunications service provider O2
As if “gender split” wasn’t bad enough…
This Explains Everything
HALF OF U.S. HIGH SCHOOLS
REQUIRE SOME STUDY
headline – Los Angeles Times
I’m not taking sides, but that right there explains the current political situation
No Wonder I Feel Like I Escaped
FROM THE OKLAHOMA DEPARTMENT OF CORRECTIONS
WE WANT YOU HERE
Welcome Sign on I-40 at the Oklahoma State Line
There is a longer story about a girl I had a huge crush on in 7th Grade named Jo Beth McNary, who knew me only as “the paperboy.” She was “all that” Miss Most Likely to be Somebody Cheerleader, Class Officer, Office Aide, who ran off with an escaped cop killer from the penitentiary in McAlester, Oklahoma. They lived for years hiding in plain sight in the Dakotas, got popped by America’s Most Wanted, brought “home” where he went back to jail and she committed suicide at 49. If that’s “wanted” then I’ll stay unpopular. And away. There always were two ways out of Oklahoma. Glad I took the Interstate.
I don’t care what you paid for, the sign said three.
THREE RIDING LESSONS FOR THE PRICE OF FOUR
Advertisement – Penney Farms Equestrian Center, Green Cove Springs, Florida
How much for eight?
It all depends on where you’re standing
BLUE SKIES UNLESS IT’S CLOUDY
Headline, San Franciso Chronicle
Nowhere is that more true than NorCal. Where, in a quarter of a mile, you can go from sunny and warm and t-shirt to cloudy and cold and jacket.
There’s Obviously Nothing About ‘Easy’ In That
From Our Lady of Sorrows Church Bulletin
Evenings at 7 in the Parish Hall
MON Alcoholics Anonymous
TUE Abused Spouses/bi-lingual
WED Eating Disorder Support Group
THU Say No To Drugs
FRI Teen Suicide Watch*
SAT Soup Kitchen/Homeless Breakfast
SUN – Homily “Our Joyous Future in Christ”
*as written that’s a little creepy
Part Two – No Fishing
Seriously. I want to get a big no fishing sign and put it on the front page. The graphic in the header came from someone who stole it from somewhere else who followed my “most superiorly and knowing blog”. Really? That person will never read, or be able to read, anything I write. Ever. The never ending quest for blind follow-backs. Always replete with stock lingerie photos or read this or I’ll shoot the depressed poet who is me, or have a “superiorly” nice day with the feel good Jesus. The big three. Sex, guilt and Jesus. Maybe they can monetize if they get to 60k. Like writing a bad song and getting the BMI check for 18 cents because nobody in Israel listened to the station that played it. But it felt good for about 1/3 of a second. Hey. God Loves Me. And I’ll bet she can spell.